the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
