its not stalking. its research.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
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