He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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