Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
