what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
