if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
