He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
