i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
