Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
