Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
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