No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
