so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
