this boner is exhausting
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
