Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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