I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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