I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
