Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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