talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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