im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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