did you get engaged???
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
