I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
