we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
it's like iHOP with fire
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
