hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
