I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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