Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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