so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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