That's when you crack a 10am beer
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
