you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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