Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Are my feet made of real feet?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
