I feel great
I just peed on a car
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
PANTIES FOUND
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
