We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
