Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
