This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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