It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
