Umm I'm too high to move.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
