doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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