No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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