I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
