Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Everyone says I win the strip club
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
