Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
