halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
