For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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