To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Randomize
