My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Randomize
