have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
