singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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