And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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