Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
