worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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