I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
there is puke in my bra ... again
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
